Sunshine and Shadows -- A metaphor of life

The past two mornings, as I was walking the trail near our house, I was looking at the patches of sunshine and shadows and thinking how like life that pattern was.  Pretty deep for so early in the morning, isn’t it?  But as I started out on the trail, I had at least a quarter of a mile of pure sunshine and green grass.  Isn’t that what life is like when you are a little child?  Endless days of play and no responsibilities except maybe to wash your hands before you eat.  Oh, there were the odd times that I had to clean my room but that was before I became obsessed with having everything perfectly clean and in its place.  That’s the pure bliss of childhood and the unobstructed sunshine!
 

Then as I got further onto the trail, the trees were lining the walkway and that’s when I encountered the patches of shade along with the sun.  Sometimes more sun and sometimes more shade. Very much like life.  As I got older and took on more and more responsibly, I found that there were times when life seemed overwhelming and I was just making my way through the shade.  Then I came to an area of the trail that has thick trees and underbrush and it was very shaded.  Again, this reminded me of times in my life when I thought that I was fighting the whole world alone. But even in this very shaded area, there were birds and squirrels scampering around the bushes and that was how my life has been too.  Even in the darkest moments, there were always times of laughter and joy. 

I returned to the last stretch of sunshine at the end of my walk and again, it’s a perfect metaphor for life.  I’ve experienced most of the difficulties (or so I hope) and now I’m again living in the sunshine. It brought to mind the quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine”. I’m not sure that I agree entirely with that because there were a lot of shadows that life threw at me and I’d rather not have experienced but when we are in the deepest shade, we can at least appreciate the birds and squirrels that are freely romping about and enjoying whatever life throws at them.  Let’s be like those birds and squirrels – let’s freely romp even if only for a little while – especially if it’s a shaded time of our life!

I would encourage you to enjoy the outdoors and nature now.  It’s a beautiful time with so many things that nature can offer us.

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature.

- Anne Frank

Awe-Inspiring Wonder Women

How often can you attend an event where the room is filled with accomplished women who are being honored for their work within their companies, communities and families?  Recently, I attended a Tribute to Women and Industry Awards dinner (TWIN). My daughter was one of the 38 recipients and I’m very proud of her and her accomplishments.  It’s not easy today for these young women to keep all of the balls in the air with the demands of work and family; now many of them have the added responsibilities of looking after elderly parents too. This wasn’t just a local event; it’s a US wide annual event that recognizes outstanding professional women who are on the management teams of companies or organizations. It’s satisfying to see a huge range of professions, ages, races and religions represented.

The speaker for the evening was extremely inspiring as she talked about finding a balance in her life and how she has struggled for almost 30 years with being an entrepreneur, a wife, mother and just trying to find some time for her, mainly for sleep.  She heaped praise on the women being honored on the night and told them that they are representing a large number of “wonder women” who are achieving so much.  

I could identify with her because I’ve been there and now I’m seeing my daughters struggling with those same issues.  But it’s encouraging to see that there are companies out there who are recognizing the contributions that these outstanding, talented women are making.  And it was heartening to know that these over-achieving women have mentors and a community of like-minded women to connect with.

Do women ever get their lives into balance or is this some myth that we’ve been fed?  Like most of you my age, I grew up with a fairytale of “having it all” so I went to work while raising my children, making sure that they went to all of the extra activities, cooked, cleaned, and in my spare time, I sewed, did crafts, grew flowers.  You name it and I tried to fit it all into a 24 hour period every day while life passed by in a blur.

The awards evening led me to thinking about my own life nowadays and ask myself, do I now have life balance?  Although retired, I am still working more than my husband would like for me to.  But it’s in my blood and I thrive on events! I can’t say no to a request to babysit my grandkids if I’m not at work. I love taking classes and lessons and am constantly signing up for some sort of class or workshop.  Usually, as soon as I sign up, I get really busy with work so I’m pedaling like crazy to keep up with everything. Currently, I’m doing 3 on-line classes and my work schedule has gone crazy.  Except for keeping my flowers healthy and “flowering”, I’ve not had time for any of my other hobbies. 

So I’ve been asking myself, is my life in balance now?  After living an extraordinary life where I was able to follow my passion for travel and combine it with work, I can tell you that life certainly wasn’t balanced then. I would say that now, I’m still not living a balanced life but I’m not sure exactly what a balanced life is.  I have more time now to do things that I want to do but I’m filling my days with “stuff” and not giving myself enough space. I’ve always taken on too much and had too many interests. I also have trouble saying no.  But at least the awards dinner has given me much food for thought.  (Really – no pun intended)  I now need to explore what a balanced life would be for me.

Maggie definitely didn't have her life in balance but she made a huge impact on a lot of lives, not just in the UK but around the world.  Was she in balance -- probably a definite NO -- but again, maybe this was "her balance".

Do you have your life in balance?  If so, I want to know how you are doing it! Or maybe you are looking to find your balance.  Again, let me know of your journey.

Alluring Holiday Plans

Are you in the process of planning your next holiday/vacation?  (I’m still using the British term holidays because it’s one of those British expressions that I just can’t break.) But don’t you think that the word holiday sounds festive, fun and loaded with anticipation? Are you already in the mood and have plans in place or do you need a boost? 

I can’t stress enough the importance of taking holidays/vacations. I wish that Americans and the American-owned companies that they work for would give them more emphasis. Having grown up in a Puritan work ethic and farming family, i.e. unless you were constantly productive, you weren’t fulfilling your role in life and on a farm, there is never a good time to take a vacation, I know that I never truly appreciated the importance of a holiday until I married a Brit who was used to taking at least 4 weeks of paid holiday time a year.  4 weeks!!!!  When we first met, I had over eight weeks of holiday saved up and no plans to use any until I met Steve.  His 4 weeks was considered trivial to our French friends who have a minimum of 6 weeks a year. To them, the idea that I’d not taken a holiday in years was just unbelievable.  They couldn’t comprehend not having 6 weeks of holiday a year and they wondered how on earth I could cope? Now that’s a very good question. What are Americans thinking; when most are considered “lucky” to get 2 weeks paid vacation a year until they can stay the course and build up to 3 weeks?

When booking your flights and tour options, have you considered airlines or tour groups that aren’t the first ones to come to mind or the most advertised?  When we flew to Peru, we booked our flights on Copa, a Peruvian owned airline, and booked our tours of Cozco, Machu Picchu and other local sites through a Norwegian company.  I know, the tour group from Norway doesn’t make sense but a lot of research went into both and it paid off big time.  Our flights were the best we’ve ever experienced and believe me; we’ve tried most of the airlines out there!  The tour excursions were absolutely perfect.  We had private guides every step of the way and couldn’t have had better guides or accommodation throughout the trip. 

When booking our trip to Japan, a lot of research went into a tour company. We chose one based here in the US, Samurai Tours, but the owner spends 10 months living and working in Japan every year so he knows, lives and breathes Japan.  He works with local tour guides who are exceptional. We rarely book our through a tour company but when visiting countries such as Peru, Japan, China, Egypt, Borneo or a safari in Africa where we know that language and culture will be a big challenge, we go with a tour group. Those trips were booked through Kuoni, a UK based company, and we can’t praise them enough. Once on the holiday, we can relax and enjoy the experiences during the trip and know that we are in good hands and that we have professional local guides who are bi-lingual. But we’ve also experienced the best of the best through the Norwegian and US companies for two trips.

We are pretty confined to day trips or a short 2-3 day trip through the rest of this summer, thanks to not a lot that I can find to eat in restaurants. So I’m now focusing on planning our Mexican trip to Cabo San Lucas in October and our Costa Rica trip in December. Meanwhile, I’m drooling over the barbeque smells drifting in from our neighbors’ patios and enjoying day trips where I know that I can get mashed potatoes or soup at a restaurant.

Think about your escape and where you’d like to go this holiday/vacation.  It might be worth it to think outside the box and consider alternatives that will give you great pleasure and lots of memories.

Check out these links to get you thinking about your next trip: www.hotwire.com, www.tripadvisor.com and www.applevacations.com.

Closet Organized Bliss

I’m still on my organizing kick and now that summer is just around the corner and hopefully we are back to warmer weather, it’s time to go through the clothes in my bedroom closet.  I sort my clothes into piles of what I wear most, seldom or not at all.  That decides what I keep and what I move to another closet to store until autumn or what I donate.  Then, I’ll bring out the summer ones so that I can get to them easily and I sort through those as well.  Even though I did this when I put them away last autumn, I do it again. This time, I try to make even tougher decisions!

If like me you are exploring what the trends are for this summer and wonder “what can I wear that won’t scream ‘old lady’?”, I suggest that you look carefully at what you already have. These would be the items that you wear most often and have been your favorites in past seasons. You can look through magazines and catalogues to determine if the fits or styles have changed slightly.

Organizing tip: for summer clothes that have thinner straps, consider using the huggable hangers.  These are the ones with a velvety coating and are super thin.  Your tops don’t slip off and into a heap on the floor.

I often have to wear black trousers along with a black sweater or blazer for work so I tend to want to wear my favorite colors during my off times.  Coral and turquoise are two of my favorites. Recently, I purchased a tote and day-time purse in a rather bright coral color because they tend to brighten up my “work uniform” and give me a happy feeling when I pick them up.  To add to the upbeat color is a cheerily patterned scarf tied onto the handle of the tote.  When grabbing the bags and leaving the house at 5am, it just makes the morning feel more pleasing and upbeat.

The perfect tee – does it exist?  Are you throwing on a tee (or t-shirt) for every day and not giving it a second thought?  Try thinking about your best colors and what flatters your skin.  Throw out all of those faded, stretched-out tees, or the ones with faded prints or sayings, and find some new ones that have a more refined fit and in colors that accentuate your coloring.  It’s a great way to be casual enough to work around the house but still feel good about yourself in the morning as you’re getting dressed.  You don’t have to dress for someone else – think about what makes you feel good about yourself.

Updating your wardrobe doesn’t mean that you throw out everything.  You can update your basics fairly inexpensively and still feel stylish. Don’t think you have to swim in a sea of only black and neutral colors.  NO WAY!  You’ll lose your fashion identity if you do.  Think outside the box and find clothes that project your personality

I find that clearing out my closets gives me control over my wardrobe and if I’m in a rush to get dressed, I can easily find outfits that go together.  I also find that even though it may seem as if I’m spending more because I’m replacing clothes every season, at least I’m not buying duplicate purchases.  When I’m done, I feel a great sense of satisfaction and also it’s rewarding to know that someone else will get use out of the clothes that I donate. 

I only slightly touched on bags (one of my passions and my husband just can’t understand why I need more than one) but didn’t even touch on items such as shoes and accessories (another passion).  That could be yet another blog post so stay tuned!

"I've always thought of the T-shirt as the Alpha and Omega of the fashion alphabet." Giorgio Armani

 

"Elegance is a question of personality, more than one's clothing." Jean-Paul Gaultier

I am an “organize junkie”

After twenty years my husband still can’t believe my love of browsing stores such as kitchen supply, office supply and general organizing supply stores.  I’m also an avid collector of actual paper catalogues that offer organizational types of products.  Even though I already have all sorts of organizing systems and methods, I’m still in search of that perfect “organizing product or system”.  And each spring seems to be the time that this eccentricity in me to re-organize cupboards, closets, pantry and every other storage area in our house comes to the surface. Steve, my husband, usually hides until I get it out of my system.

Recently, I took a trip to the Container Store.  There wasn’t anything in particular that I was looking for, but knew that I would find just that perfect solution to one of my organizing projects.  I found a better organizing system for my jewelry; plus I found a few other items just for fun.  I’m particularly drawn to small gadgets either for the kitchen or office.  Things that I never knew that I needed; but when I see them, they make perfect sense. 

Having managed two trans-Atlantic moves, I’m rigorous about not having any extra items in our house.  I’m quite firm about the rule that if it isn’t used within a year, it should be donated or thrown out.  This is a totally foreign concept to my husband, who is a hoarder and his filing system consists of stacking papers, yet he always knows where everything is.  I have to admit that it is probably pretty ruthless on my part but since he is a scientist, he sees the logic in my rule. 

Here are just some of my routine de-cluttering projects:

Kitchen cupboards: Since I’m an avid coupon user, I usually have to buy more than one of any item. This means that we have 3-4 tins or packages of one item in our cupboards. I’m constantly trying to check the labels to make sure that I move the older items to the front so that we use those first.  Extras that don’t fit into the cupboards go on to shelves in our garage.

Closets: I go through our closets twice a year and donate items that we haven’t worn (at least those items from my husband that I can sneak out of the closet or those that I can pry away from him.)

Bookcases: This is one that I agonize over only because reading is a passion for me and I go through books quite quickly.  I don’t read them more than once but I just don’t take the time, as I should, to go through our books and donate the ones that we’ve read.  This is one of my projects for the next few weeks. Last year, a friend was sending books to troops who were recovering from injuries from the wars in both Iraq and Afghanistan so I sent two big boxes of books to them. I can’t think of a better way to clean out my bookcases!

Bathroom: I try and get through our bathroom cupboard and drawers a couple of times a year – especially my makeup drawer.  Why do I always end up with at least 2-3 tubes of lipstick that’s the same color but I never wear?

Office: Here’s where I really love my little gadgets!  I have a USB hub, lots of colored post its and colored highlighters, tabs, folders, you name it and I have it.  I love color coordinating all of my projects. And I’ve recently found some cable tidy devices that hopefully will help keep my cat from chewing on my computer cables.

Garage: This is an area where my husband and I don’t agree.  I’d love to have a perfectly neat and tidy garage while still being able to keep my car with room to get out.  At the moment, my car fits perfectly, as does his when we switch (big difference in size).  But I’d really love a whole wall of pegboard to hang “stuff” that always accumulates in a garage. This is one of my goals for this spring.

Declutting, throwing out or donating unused items and reorganizing gives me a sense of order in my life – a sense of control and achievement!

Do you need to have a “declutter” session or reorganize any area of your home?  Take it a step at a time but make it a priority.  It will lift your spirits and give you a sense of accomplishment.

Good luck with your organization endeavors!

Keeping Motivated to Exercise

This coming Monday (April 7^th) is World Health Day.  It’s the 64^th anniversary of WHO (1948) and this years’ theme is Aging and Heath.  We all have aging in common, and let’s face it - it’s better than the alternative. What better time to access where you are since we are now a quarter of the way through 2012.  Can you believe how quickly the time is going by?  How are you doing on the healthy goals that you set?  Still exercising?  If you are like most people who set an exercising goal for 2012, you’ve probably let it slip by now.

Due to recent jaw surgery, I had to stop exercising for a while.  “A while” was actually 5 weeks because before the surgery, in addition to working very long hours, I had a major sinus infection plus throat and ear infections that I was trying to kick.  Then following the surgery, I had another couple of weeks when I couldn’t exercise. Since exercising isn’t my favorite activity anyway, it would have been all too easy for me to just stop entirely.  But as soon as I had the OK to take it up again, I forced myself back to the gym.  I’ve been going again every morning and have increased my workouts gradually during the first week so that I’m now even beyond where I was before.  I’ve also started a weights class twice a week.  While I love lifting weights, I have trouble staying motivated if I have to constantly work out on my own so I find taking a class with others helps the time pass more quickly and it helps to keep me motivated.  I’m hoping that it will also help me get motivated to resume my weights on the days that I don’t have classes.

Following my surgery, I set myself a goal of walking a minimum of 3 miles a day and if I have the time I do 5 miles – that’s my goal for the day, every day for 4 weeks.  This isn’t just slogging along because I do intervals and inclines on the treadmill, increasing the speed and inclines to challenge my body when I can.  I’m not sure why I chose these distances or 4 weeks but it’s just a goal that I set.  These miles have to be in addition to any other exercise that I get throughout my day. 

Setting and tracking my goal helps motivate me to complete my goal. My husband gave me a Fitbit pedometer as a gift a few months ago so I’ve been wearing it faithfully.  It connects to my computer so that I can also log in the foods that I eat and calculate the calories that I take in.  Once you see the calorie in calculations versus the calories that you burn during your activities, the ratio in versus calories out all becomes much more real.

There are still days when I could so easily find a hundred excuses to not go to the gym.  That’s why I go first thing, very early, every morning. I am determined to accomplish my goal so I force myself out the door and once I get going, it’s not so bad.  I always feel better for having done it. 

So, are you still working on your healthy goals?  If the thought of going to a gym makes you cringe, there are so many other activities that you can do to keep active.  If you are bored with your usual exercise, try something new such as a new activity or a new class.  It will keep your body challenged and refresh your attitude.

 Join me by continuing your healthy goals for the rest of 2012!

Flowers – a Common Bond Across Nationalities and Ages

Spring is officially here although the weather in Maryland this past winter has seemed like we’ve been having spring since November.  Along with the warm weather has been the early arrival of flowers and budding trees.  I love them all – everything from the daffodils along the motorways to the flowers that are adorning my postage stamp garden.  The colors and scents are leaving me in a better mood and happier. In anticipation of planting my containers; I’m beginning my plans for a deck and patio filled to overflowing with flowers this summer.

To begin my spring fling with flowers this year, I visited the Philadelphia International Flower Show.  For those who haven’t been to a flower show but love plants and flowers, it’s an experience that I’d highly recommend; however, a show as large as the one in Philadelphia can be overwhelming.  When you first walk in, it’s hard to know where to begin.

I started my tour through the show with one of my favorite flowers, the orchids. There were so many varieties in gorgeous colors; it reminded me of the orchid gardens that we visited in Kuala Lumpur a few years back.  The Kuala Lumpur Orchid Garden is located at the highest point in the Lake Garden and is filled with flowers and enchanting butterflies. It’s one of the most beautiful and serene gardens that I’ve visited. 

From the orchids, we proceeded on to the masses of tulips.  These displays reminded me of our visits to the Keukenhof Gardens in The Netherlands.  There was even a display there from the Keukenhof. We’ve been lucky enough to visit at the height of the spring blooming season when in addition to the thousands and thousands of tulips, there’s an abundance of colors and fragrances from other spring flowers. It was so stunning that we had to go back a couple of times.

One of my favorite areas was the Ikebana displays.  Ikebana is the art of Japanese flower arranging and the show presented several different styles of arrangements.  I studied Ikebana with a Japanese Master while living in London so seeing these displays prompted me to attend one of the workshops while at the show.  During the workshop, the Master prepared 7 different arrangements, which has inspired me to get out my kenzans and study my text books.  I want to see if I can still follow all the rules and disciplines of my favorite style.

This week, on the spur of the moment my husband and I decided to visit the cherry blossoms in Washington DC.  They were at their peak and the blossoms were the fullest that I’ve ever seen them.  We wandered around the entire tidal basin taking in the glorious blossoms.  It was also fun to hear all the various languages spoken by the other visitors.  People were happily chatting and enjoying spending time together while enjoying the beautiful scenery.

Flowers have always been a huge part of my life.  As a little girl, my mother had several flower gardens that she tended enthusiastically. I’d wander through them and if I thought I could get away with it, I’d pick some to take into the house with me. I’ve since visited gardens in many countries and have found that plants and flowers have the same affect on people regardless of their nationalities, bringing them happiness and boosting their moods.  I hadn’t realized that March 12^th was “plant a flower day”. I missed it but I’m sure that any day will work.  If you love flowers, I encourage you to take the time today to find a way to enjoy them!

 Happy Spring!! 

“Flowers are love's truest language” - Park Benjamin

Happiness is to hold flowers in both hands. - Japanese Proverb